no one listens to you...they don't have to

Given that humility isn't core curriculum at most executive education programs, how do you develop servant leader skills if they don't come naturally? Volunteer work can be an excellent autocracy neutralizer, suggests Jeremy Brandt, founder of FastHomeOffers.com, a $1.35 million company that generates leads for real estate investors. Shortly before launching his business four years ago, Brandt was asked by the pastor at his church in Grapevine, Texas, to lead a fellowship group of about 15 people. Brandt, a get-it-done kind of guy, soon found himself in charge of 25 such groups. His big-stick approach fell apart. "It's very natural as you manage more and more people to let your ego get in the way," says Brandt. "It's illuminating to manage volunteers because if you act that way, no one listens to you. They don't have to." Instead, Brandt began asking questions. What problems do you have? How can I help you? He drew on the experience to shape his performance as CEO. "At the company, I solve people's problems," he says. "I give them what they need so they can blossom." 

Leigh Buchanan

In Praise of Selflessness: Why the best leaders are servants. Inc. magazine. May 1, 2007.

find Him in the temple

Here is my promise to you: Every sincere seeker of Jesus Christ will find Him in the temple. You will feel His mercy. You will find answers to your most vexing questions. You will better comprehend the joy of His gospel.

Russell M. Nelson

"The Lord Jesus Christ Will Come Again" General Conference October 2024

let me know Thy will

When you face adversity, you can be led to ask many questions. Some serve a useful purpose; others do not. To ask, Why does this have to happen to me? Why do I have to suffer this now? What have I done to cause this? will lead you into blind alleys. It really does no good to ask questions that reflect opposition to the will of God. Rather ask, What am I to do? What am I to learn from this experience? What am I to change? Whom am I to help? How can I remember my many blessings in times of trial? Willing sacrifice of deeply held personal desires in favor of the will of God is very hard to do. Yet when you pray with real conviction, “Please let me know Thy will” and “May Thy will be done,” you are in the strongest position to receive the maximum help from your loving Father.

Richard G. Scott

"Trust in the Lord" General Conference October 1995

real intent means that one really intends to follow

Asking questions and searching for meaning are a natural and normal part of our mortal experience. At times, not readily having complete answers can bring us to the edge of our understanding, and those limitations can feel frustrating or overwhelming. Wondrously, Heavenly Father’s plan of happiness for all of us is designed to help us progress despite our limitations and accomplish what we cannot accomplish on our own, even without a complete knowledge of all things. God’s plan is merciful toward the limitations of our humanity; provides us with our Savior, Jesus Christ, to be our Good Shepherd; and inspires us to use our agency to choose Him.

Elder Dieter F. Uchtdorf has taught that “asking questions isn’t a sign of weakness,” but rather “it’s a precursor of growth.” Speaking directly to our personal effort as seekers of truth, our prophet, President Russell M. Nelson, has taught that we must have “a deep desire” and “ask with a sincere heart [and] real intent, having faith in [Jesus] Christ.” He has further taught that “‘real intent’ means that one really intends to follow the divine direction given.”

Tracy Y. Browning

"Seeking Answers to Spiritual Questions" General Conference October 2024

interacting with your boss

Interacting with your boss… requires you to know what your boss needs and expects…. It’s important enough to examine the problem in more detail:

Going along. Many direct reports figure it’s the boss’s responsibility to tell them what she needs and expects. It’s true, many bosses fail to do a good job of it. There are lots of reasons bosses don’t communicate – they can’t express, or haven’t the time, to discuss their needs; or they assume their employees already know their needs, etc. So, the direct reports go along in the dark.

Probing. The direct report also has a responsibility to dig for the information about his boss’s needs and expectations when the boss fails to volunteer them. This can be risky. However, the alternative of wasting time and effort not knowing and guessing at what the boss wants is worse. So, the answer to the dilemma is that the direct report is obligated to probe to get this important information.

Here are four questions to answer that will tell you about the boss’s needs and expectations:

1. What does the boss find difficult to do? Knowing this can be invaluable during an interaction, because it provides a strong clue as to where and when you should exert leadership, especially if what’s difficult for her is easy for you. For example, if she dislikes doing detailed long-range planning, but you are good at it, she will probably be happy for you to take the lead when your meeting gets into this subject.
2. In what form does the boss most easily grasp things? We all absorb certain kinds of information more readily than others. For instance, a boss who isn’t number-oriented may become bored by your reading off figures. In this case, you may make your presentation more effective by preparing several bar graphs or pie charts.
3. Does the boss prefer a statement of the problem or a recommended solution? Different bosses prefer to enter the problem-solving process at different points. Some want to be involved right from the start to help clarify the problem. Others want only to be involved in the solution.
4. Does the boss prefer hearing or reading about problems? Some bosses like to learn information face-to-face so they can ask questions on the spot. Others prefer to be alerted by memo or e-mail so they can mull over the situation before meeting on it.

R. Lefton, Victor R. Buzzotta

Leadership Through People Skills. McGraw Hill Professional, 2004.

man’s response must be man’s own self

To most questions man wants to have an answer. But to the Lord’s question man must be an answer. From man, God does not need information. Man’s response must be man’s own self. As each human being is different, so will be each response.

The Lord’s Question: Thoughts on the Life of Response by Dennis Rasmussen. Brigham Young University Press. April 1985. Chapter One, “Where Art Thou?” p.7, 8

unto what were ye ordained?

“Wherefore, I the Lord ask you this question – unto what were ye ordained?” (Doctrine and Covenants 50:13.) All man’s beginnings and endings occur within the circle of these words. Man was ordained to disclose the Divine; his work is to become like God. Thr trials of life are the way of perfection.

The Lord’s Question: Thoughts on the Life of Response by Dennis Rasmussen. Brigham Young University Press. April 1985. Chapter One, “Where Art Thou?” p.6

gird up now thy loins

Gird up now thy loins like a man; for I will demand of thee, and answer though me.

Job 38:3 as quoted in The Lord’s Question: Thoughts on the Life of Response by Dennis Rasmussen. Brigham Young University Press. April 1985. Chapter One, “Where Art Thou?” p.5

where art thou?

Adam, where art thou? Does God not know? On the contrary, only he knows. In my weakness I lose my bearings. Like a child wandering in a forest I follow the whims of the monument and forget the way. I am too caught up by my surroundings to follow the path. Not until a Father’s voice calls do I wonder where I am. How shall I answer? I am here? But where is here? So helpless am I that I cannot say. But deep within I hear his voice and tremble, for finally there are just two places, with him or without him, and just two ways, toward him or not toward him.

The Lord’s Question: Thoughts on the Life of Response by Dennis Rasmussen. Brigham Young University Press. April 1985. Chapter One, “Where Art Thou?” p.4, 5

knowledge alone can never satisfy

For all that it has helped man learn, the claim that man is primarily a being who questions is inadequate. It may create minds without hearts. It may lead to the worship of information on the one hand or to skepticism on the other. Even worse, it may lead to despair, for knowledge alone can never satisfy. Will man be happy when he has split the last atom and searched all the sands of the sea? Deeper than the desire to know is the desire to be known. Man’s fundamental need is not to ask a question but to respond to one. Only by responding do I learn to be responsible; only by responding do I learn to care about something beyond myself.

The Lord’s Question: Thoughts on the Life of Response by Dennis Rasmussen. Brigham Young University Press. April 1985. Chapter One, “Where Art Thou?” p.4

what is a question

What is a question? I must use on even to ask. Perhaps it is impossible to define something so basic to thought. A question is unique. Yet my life from childhood to maturity has been filled with questions. Wisdom, I have heard, is as much a matter of knowing the important questions as of having their answers. Questions focus my attention and my efforts. They are a summons to learning. Long ago the great teachers found that people learn best when they are asked instead of simply told. A question is a challenge, the beginning of a quest. 

There is an old tradition that views man as the being who asks the questions. In the words of Aristotle, “All men by nature desire to know.” From this point of view man is distinguished by his power to discover. The mark of man is a question. The history of the ages is the record of man’s questions. When an old question is answered or even just abandoned and a new one replaces it, then a new age begins. All the knowledge that creates civilization emerges in answer to human questions. The history of religion follows this same pattern, as it tells of man’s quest for God. In all things man’s progress is the progress of man’s questions. They lead to knowledge, and knowledge is power.

There is another tradition even older that makes a different claim. It asserts that man is born into the world with a question and that he lives his life with a question, but it is not man’s question. In this view man is not primarily a being who questions, but a being who is questioned. The question addressed to man persists, harder than stone, softer than snow, more insistent than the warmth of the sun. “Where art thou?” (Genesis 3:9.) Man is distinguished not by his power to ask but by his power to hear. The question with which he lives is not his own, but God’s. 

The Lord’s Question: Thoughts on the Life of Response by Dennis Rasmussen. Brigham Young University Press. April 1985. Chapter One, “Where Art Thou?” p.3,4